There are multiple phases of a relationship and the first one being the “honeymoon” phase, a term we hear a lot. During this phase it is common to partake in “love bombing”, involving the constant showering of affection, gifts, and promises for the future. At this point, neither people are showing their true selves because they are still getting comfortable with one another which is why it is not always easy to spot the behavior of a narcissistic or manipulative person. In healthy relationships, the honeymoon phase slowly dies out as the partnership becomes more real and you go through real life with one another, through the ups and downs. On the other hand, it is common to tell yourself that you need to be in a relationship whether there are signs of an abuser or not.
You MUST keep your head above your heart and use logic every day in a relationship, and that is not always easy but it is one of the most important things when in a relationship. The love you give is a choice, you choose to wake up and love this person through the good and the bad despite what you get in return. Narcissistic love is based on what they are getting, period, and that is why they use the love bombing tactic throughout the whole relationship— to enforce their “love” with gifts and fake kindness. Unfortunately, if their partner does not give the love they want in return, the abuser turns to shouting, the silent treatment, or even physical abuse.