Narcissist vs. Sociopath

The idea of a healthy relationship is something that we don’t often think about because why would we ever get into an unhealthy one?

Before entering into any type of relationship, you have to understand who you are and what you want. You must know your values. Without this, you will not be able to establish your standards and what you deserve in someone. You also have to be happy with where you are in life. Too many times I see people jump into relationships for the sole purpose of being able to say they have someone. You do not want to be dependent on someone to fill that void of self-love and loneliness because that will not make the base of a healthy, happy or lasting relationship.

There are a few key things to keep in mind in regards to finding a healthy relationship:

ACCEPTANCE

You have to let your partner be who they are. You can never try and change someone and if you do, then they are not right for you. You have to accept every part of your partner. The good and the bad. If you find yourself constantly picking them apart and wanting to change everything they do, odds are you want someone else.

UNDERSTANDING

We have to understand what love is. You CHOOSE to love someone. Falling in love is emotional but staying in love and staying connected year after year is a choice. You have to understand that within a relationship you will have to compromise and they will compromise for you as well, that is how it works.

RESPONSIBILITY

Taking responsibility for your own actions can diminish many fights. You choose to respond and the react the way you do. You can also choose to take responsibility for when you are wrong. Taking responsibility for your own happiness in any relationship will allow you to not make your partner responsible to fill out up inside.

HONESTY/RESPECT

Healthy and happy couples have a deep level of respect for their partner. They know who they are and respect and love them for it. With that comes honesty, being in touch with your feelings and stating them is always important. If both of you can be honest with how you feel and where you are at in your relationship then things will always run smoothly. When we cannot be honest is when resentment can begin to build up in any relationship.

TRUST

At the start of any relationship trust must be built. It is the little things that happen over time that prove to us that someone else is worthy of our trust and of our heart. If you are constantly questioning your partner’s intention or what they are doing when you are not around and more fights are arising then this is where you have to decide is this the bases of a healthy relationship?

MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP A PRIORITY

Regardless of how long you have been with this person, putting them first goes a long way. Take the extra time to make them feel loved. Flirty, laugh, be silly, remember who you were and the things you did in the beginning of your relationship that created the spark that you had.

FIGHTS

This is your opportunity to own your part and try to see your partners side even when you do not agree. You have to remember that you are a team with the same goal. When couples become nasty and blame one another, it does more harm than good. You have to respect each other’s opinions and find the resolution together.

A healthy relationship does not always come easy because there are many things that go into it. If both people are willing to put in the work then you will always have a healthy and happy relationship.  You have to respect, trust, be honest, understand, and accept your partner. When you fight, you must stay calm and take a breath before you say something you will regret.

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About Stephanie

Stephanie coaches her clients that have recently gone through a divorce or ended a relationship. She teaches them the process of healing.

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