3 Tips for Handling a Narcissist
Jun 22, 20201. MANAGE YOUR EXPECTATIONS
Do not be fooled by what you are seeing. There is always a motivation behind their “good behavior.” This is where most people get stuck because they want to believe someone is good. They want to believe that this person can change. The victim does this through projection or cognitive dissonance.
Either they want this person to be something they are not and do not want to face the truth, most likely due to insecurity or wound within the victim. The other issue is cognitive dissonance. When you have once seen a person at their best when you have received a taste of what you are looking for, and then it goes away, that back and forth between personalities confuses people, and they begin to long for what was.
2. PRACTICE HAVING GOOD BOUNDARIES
Boundaries cannot be set if you do not have standards. Your standards are how you want to be treated. If they are not high and you lack the confidence to communicate with others for a multitude of reasons verbally, then you will have poor boundaries. You cannot let your boundaries become flexible with someone who has NPD.
That is why working on yourself is so important. You will never be able to stay consistent with an abuser if you lack self-worth and self-esteem to create these boundaries and stick with them.
3. LEARN HOW TO HANDLE BACKLASH
Once you have reached the place where you can set boundaries with this person, you will be tested again. Now you will have to learn how to handle the backlash that will undoubtedly come your way. Here is where you must master these two things; learn to disengage when necessary and be prepared to self-soothe through what you are going through.
